Oh, so there's nothing wrong from your side!

ME: ********* resident technical support, Rand_4 is speaking, how may I help?
Customer: Yes, I've been trying to connect for the last few days, it doesn't log in at all! Something wrong from your side?
ME: I can't tell without checking...

***Took the customer's account details, turned out that his line have been up for 2 weeks without a single drop. and his line can hold up to 8Mbps (He subscribed for 1Mbps)***

ME: Sir, the line is connected for 2 weeks without a single drop.
Customer: How can that be? I've been trying to connect for the last few days and nothing work; no MSN Messenger, no SKYPE, no WoW, no nothing! Is there a new cut in the submarine cables again?
ME: We haven't been informed about any though I doubt. But from what I see in my sys... (interrupted)
Customer: Then why it doesn't work?
ME: I don't know, probably something from your side, let's check few stuff in your computer. If nothing worked, I'll write a request to send you a technician to check things out.
Customer: OK.

***Checked the IP configurations. Long story short, I kinda figured that his workplace doesn't have DHCP enabled so he HAVE to set things manually. The guy forgot to switch his settings to (Obtain from server) for both IP Addresses and DNS settings***

ME: So there you go. Problem solved. Anything else I can help you with?
Customer: What was the problem?
ME: Just to make sure, you take your laptop to your work, right?
Customer: Yes, why?
ME: Well, your work uses specific IP Addresses that only works in their sy... (interrupted)
Customer: Arabic please.
ME: OK, Your work place has specific set of configuration that they applied on your laptop that doesn't work on your router. So basically, you weren't able to connect because you kept the work's settings you just didn't reconfigured things.
Customer: Oh, so there's nothing from your side!
ME: Yes, you had configuration issues and we just solved it.
Customer: No submarine cables issues?
ME: No, we haven't been informed about it. And I doubt that will happen.
Customer: Oh ok, bye.
ME: Anythi... (Customer hung up)

Now, this isn't the first customer that acts this rude and ill-mannered. So I kinda got used to it.

But seriously, did people get used to the "Submarine cable issues" incidents that, they assume instantly it's the problem?

And what's with the interrupting attitude? I'd understand if he was a teenager or an old-fashioned old man (Don't get me wrong, they're well mannered [few exceptions with teenagers], but they usually snap when they sense something wrong). But he was a FUCKING DOCTOR!!!

How did I know? There's "Dr. " before his name... Well, whatever...



Next story will be titled: "IT DOESN'T WORK!"

I'm 4 months leech old!

To give you a brief about my work, I work in ********* ISP in the resident helpdesk department. We're operational 24/7 and the guys here work really hard regardless what people usually say...

I wont be mentioning real names since I consider'em company's secrets... So here we go:

ME: ********* resident technical support, Rand_4 is speaking, how may I help?
Customer: I can't connect to my wireless. Can you help me?

***We provide wireless support if (And only if) they bought our router because we configure the remote access so we could fix things remotely***

ME: Ofcourse, what's your DSL phone number?
Customer: It's 2*******.

***Few keystrokes and mouse clicks to check our system***

ME: Sir, do you remember your wireless key?
Customer: Wireless key? My wireless was open the whole time! It just got locked today for some reason.
ME: Are you the only use in the house?
Customer: Yes, I've been using it for 4 months without password or wireless key or whatever.

***Few more keystrokes and mouse clicks to access his router and check things out***

ME: Sir, your wireless network's name is *********?
Customer: No, it's XXXX.

***Note that (*********) is the ISP's name, we usually set the router to the ISP's name, while (XXXX) is the router's brand name which is the same brand that we sell***

ME: Sir, your router is ********* and the password is ##########... You probably have been using the neighbor's wireless for the last four months!
Customer: What? You mean, I've been paying for 4 months without using my DSL connection at all!?
ME: Seems like it. In any event, your wireless name is ********* and the password is XXXXXXXXXX... Do you want me to guide you through connecting to yours?
Customer: Yes, please.

***Guiding the customer through connecting the laptop to his wireless router... And luckily, he's using Windows Vista, way easy to guide over the phone: Just click on the wireless icon, choose your connection, put password and you're in***

ME: So, are you online now? Can you access any website?
Customer: Yes, but how can I make sure it's not slow?
ME: Go to download.com, download any big file and tell me the download speed.

***Guided the customer to download AVG Antivirus just to see if it's actually slow or not***

Customer: I didn't get that number before!
ME: Well, that's your internet speed. The connection you've been using is probably the neighbor's and they seem to be subscribed for something slower than your connection.
Customer: I knew there's something wrong. Thank you so much for helping me.
ME: Anything else I can help you with?
Customer: Kidding me? I'll download the whole internet now! Thank you so much!!
ME: Thank you for calling *********. Have a nice day.

So I hung up the phone, went to my supervisor and told him about the incident, he sprayed his coffee laughing...



Seriously, The customer subscribed in *********, wouldn't it be so obvious that the ********* wireless connection is his noting that the signal was SO POWERFUL (Almost full) compared to the other XXXX with almost no signal?





Next story will be titled: "Oh, so there's nothing wrong from your side!"